she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
