She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
