everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
