I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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