I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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