I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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