forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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