And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
