This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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