I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
