i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
