What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
