Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
