Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
wanna go halves on a baby?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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