How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
