Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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