Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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