Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Randomize
