HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
