I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
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