i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
