i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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