So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
