just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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