i need an iv and a liver transplant
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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