butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Randomize
