just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
