Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
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