he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
