He is such a slut. More and more my type.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
