I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
