why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Randomize