I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
