Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
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