When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
