i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
