Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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