So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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