Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
