You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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