you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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