please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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