Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
