Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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