p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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