I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
