some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
