dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
