Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Someone shit on the floor
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
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