"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize